Hitting my home bookshelf

Regulars to my page may notice it looks a little bit different up top…The artwork for my debut eco thriller novel has been completed. Incidentally, my author copies of the actual physical book have hit my doormat and are now safely in my hands.

It is absolutely beautiful and everything that could have hoped it would be. My wonderful publishers did an amazing job, while listening to my long wishlist and patiently answering my endless questions (a former journalist never stops asking!).

This cover is more than just a cover – it is the culmination of 6am starts, lunchbreak writing in my car with a laptop on my lap, and gone midnight finishes (when the kids are in bed and I should be too).

My novel started life in a graveyard – where else? I had been given a writing task by my local writers’ group to come up with something on the theme of ‘autumn’ – I was sat on a bench in my lunch break and I looked down at a leaf…a brown one with holes in it and I thought ‘what if all the trees were dying an it wasn’t really autumn at all?’ I have had an idea festering for years in my mind about acid rain – I love films and I’ve seen disaster films about volcanos, twisters, floods and the second Ice Age (The Day After Tomorrow) and I thought why hasn’t this been done yet? I grew up in the 80’s and 90’s and learning about rainforests being massacred and the Greenhouse Effect. True enough, acid rain is generally no more acidic than lemon juice, but I thought it would be worse if you combined the man-made effect of water pollution and weather cycles to heighten the danger – so that it would affect not only buildings, but also have a catastrophic on the brain…what would it turn you into?

I didn’t win the competition – my first draft was awful. But, I felt I had the start of an intriguing idea. I ended up writing the bare bones of it while I was pregnant and was watching a lot of The Walking Dead, and one of my favourite films is 28 Days Later – a true zombie film, that came out when I was living and working in London. The thing that resonated with me was the main character walking through the deserted streets of the city and I have only experienced that once – when I was walking in my lunchbreak through Farringdon and it was just before a World Cup match and England were playing. The streets were deserted and it was beyond eery to see a city turned into a ghost town. I kept imagining what it would be like to walk streets empty like that and not know why, where everyone had gone and what danger was lurking round every corner. All of the above is certainly what inspired me when I wrote the scenes of the escape from Whitehall. I won’t say too much for fear of spoilers!

So, back to the book cover…I should point out that I had to insist on several trigger warnings on the cover and the inside pages. If you’re faint of heart, this book really isn’t for you. But if you love the thrill of a chase, the extreme consequences of climate change playing out, enemies to lovers, the fear of unrequited love, and zombies…a lot of them, then hit the ‘pre-order’ button…

I will be doing a follow-up post about the evolution of this book cover and the decisions behind it. So stay tuned. My novel is coming out on 23rd January 2024, which incidentally is my eldest child’s birthday. This was the date given to me by my publishers and is symbolic in itself. This book is essentially my first baby – it was created from within myself; every cell is my own DNA. If I hadn’t kept going and dusted it off during lockdown to revitalise it, certainly it would be languishing on my USB stick at the bottom of a drawer somewhere.

A lot of people have asked me how I did it; how I wrote a book…well, my house didn’t get cleaned for about a year while I met the publisher’s editing deadlines and we only had clean dishes but for the sterling efforts of my dishwasher (I had to say goodbye to my old Indesit of 15 years at the beginning of the summer – may you live on happily in Silicon Heaven). Other than that, it was my sheer stubbornness that kept me going after multiple rejections from agents and rousing words from the husband who gave me a metaphorical kick up the arse when things got tough – I gave up approaching agents after nearly a year of trying in 2022, and went directly to publishers instead…a mix of large and small ones. A lot won’t even entertain submissions of unagented authors. But just after Christmas, around the time I was hospitalised with pneumonia, I was offered a contract. While I was getting better, I looked over my contract and happily accepted to go with an independent – Cranthorpe Millner, who have been brilliant with me from start to finish. If it wasn’t for them, I wouldn’t be writing this now.

I can recommend The Writers and Artists Yearbook to find lists of agents and publishers, Writing Magazine to keep up to date with writerly news, and joining The Society of Authors.

It’s not over yet, time will tell whether or not this whole thing works – sales and reviews (and pre-orders) are the proof of the pudding. But I’ve done my upmost best to make my novel the very best it can be, and for anyone who reads it, I hope they enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it (even after the 100th time of editing it).

For now, there are various things coming up…a Bookstagram tour, reviews from my ARC readers, a few more videos/posts on my various social media channels – Facebook (Lucy Ghose – writer), Instagram and Tiktok @lucyghose – follow me to keep up with my writing news! We are planning a signed book giveaway before the book launch in January/Feb, so I will be releasing details nearer the time.

In the meanwhile, my novel is available for pre-order at Amazon, Waterstones, Barnes & Noble, WHSmiths and all major bookshops. Thank you all for your support on my writing journey as the story continues…

And now for something a little different…

I’m attempting something I’ve never done before – I’m writing a music review (bear with me). And the reason is because I read something quite intriguing about a song, watched the video (the like of which is something you can’t unsee) and then read the lyrics. And now I can’t stop thinking about it.

Let me start at the beginning, with a confession… I’ve got three books on the go. Four, if you count the only thing residing on my Kindle app. I’m obviously not reading them all the same time (I haven’t got enough hands, for a start). I’m not usually one for reading novels from a screen, I prefer to read from an actual page, a paperback.

However, for various reasons I’ve had a lot of hospital and GP appointments to attend this year and plenty of time waiting in queues at the pharmacy. So, therefore something to read on my phone helps pass the time. I’ve been working my way through Barry Page’s Down To The Tracks – a discography of one of my favourite bands, a-ha. I’m a child of the 80’s, so how could I not have heard of Take On Me – the comic book style pop video where the male singer literally entices the girl through the pages and into his edgy, dangerous but alluring world, only for him to return, bursting into her world and hopefully into her arms (we never see them embrace).      

But after then, mainstream media failed to reach the girl brought up in deepest, darkest Dorset. In a time when there were only four TV channels, the radio only picked up the news channels and our family vinyl collection was Michael Jackson, The Jungle Book soundtrack and The Snowman. 

Anyone who knows my story knows that I only rediscovered a-ha’s music again in the long days and nights of lockdown. So I am green to much of their music back catalogue and I fancied being tutored through it by way of a book – cue Barry Page, and his work is interspersed with anecdotes and much of the political and creative tussles of egos, etc, but also the band’s own take on the songs.

I am a little embarrassed to have such a massive knowledge gap here of that quirky, unconventional Norwegian band who do things very much their own way and couldn’t be generic even if they tried. But here I have the underdog advantage – I am seeing a lot of this for the first time with fresh eyes and it is taking me a shamefully long time to get through this book on my kindle. But, waiting for one of my many appointments, I read a quote from Magne about the song Celice, released in 2005 (he wrote it), where he said it was like the evil twin of “Take On Me” – which is a positive video with a happy ending. But that Celice is a quest for passion and intimacy, closeness and love but in a negative way. There were warnings about prostitution, sex and drugs in the video. This, coming from the band that have made music videos about imagining and playing out their death scenes, I’m not put off by their macabre and dark humour. How could I not take a look on the flipside version of TOM?

Not one of their music videos is a replica of any previous, visually, in my opinion, though I stand to be corrected. Celice begins with the descent into the underworld – a streetwalker approaching a car and a flickering off and on of the scenes in ‘thermal imaging’. The band, Morten first of all, enters a hallway. He is already shown in thermal hues, an effect which flickers on and off during the song.

It’s quite impressive – no judgement is cast, no sanctimonious tones, in fact, what strikes me most of all, is the band are often bystanders of the debauchery, not complicit, Mags for example is sitting within breathing distance of the semi-naked dancer but resolutely has his back to her. Pal is sitting alone in a bedroom.

Looking back of the ‘evil twin’ comment by Magne, it’s safe to say the events of the dark world culminate in a dark tone. Temptation is served out and spent. But of the band? All of them fall foul to the thermal imaging effects – maybe this is the metaphor for how they are drawn into that world, but never succumb to temptation. As they reach the peak of the song, they are filmed in ‘normal’ mode until just before ending of the song, where they transform in the rainbow hues of the netherworld once more, never to return.

And then I took a closer look at the lyrics. They are short, but anything other than sweet. Toxic, if anything, as Magne described there are relationships where you’re subjecting yourself to a lot of pain. For example, here’s some of the lyrics:

It’s in the way you hurt me
Celice
I know that I’m alive

It’s in the way you hurt me…You know it feels so nice
Hold me tight now
Hold me tight as can be

Pain comes from pleasure, or vice versa. And doing something inherently bad can feel naughtily good. What does that tell us? Being straight-laced all the time is boring, pushing the boundaries of fun might just be worth it, but to not go too far beyond that mark. But leaving how far one would go deliberately blurry is what they have done here. What they do or don’t do in their own private life may be hidden in plain sight, but it is still very much up to them how much they divulge to the wider world.

I think it’s clear from this that it is not only Pal who is the lyrical genius here in this band. We all know every one of them has a special role to play and a special place in our hearts. You couldn’t fail to be drawn into the lyrics and video of Celice, which does beg the question ‘where next will they take me?’ I guess I’ll have to keep reading to find out….

Please ‘like’ my writing page www.facebook.com/LucyGhose to stay updated with my writing journey. My novel The Poison Balance is coming soon, published by Cranthorpe Millner Publishers. I am also on Instagram and Tiktok @lucyghose

Not Quite The End

When your male main character is based on this guy, anything is possible…

I’ve reached a particular milestone…I’ve finished the very last edit run of my debut novel.

So, from the sitting-down-and-thrashing-it-out-at-my-desk point of view, my work is done. The very evening that I finished my edits and hit ‘send’, I had visions of cracking open a bottle of prosecco and celebrating. Fifteen minutes into our somewhat late evening meal with my husband, and my eldest projectile vomited all over her bed (and herself). Joy.

I’ve spent half the week looking after her, while trying in vain to keep up with the housework and general life admin, while trying to juggle contemplation of my next book (following on from the events of The Poison Balance) and reflection of what I have achieved so far.

Ten years from the initial idea created while sat in a graveyard, and first draft written from behind the wheel of my car, in a staff canteen, 6am before work, 9pm until the late hours, sat in the kitchen while waiting for endless pans of water to boil. After the delights of lockdown, it’s safe to say I can hot-desk anywhere. Give me a clear space to put my laptop and I’m there.

Add children into the mix and it’s a brand new ball game. Creating a synopsis while the eldest plays the recorder in my ear – ‘am I good, mummy?’ while the youngest demands endless snacks – I have written quite a bit of my book with children literally swinging off my legs.

I love my children and they deserve my attention and devotion – I will always stop what I am doing to help them and play with them, but it is also important for them to see mummy doing what she loves and that it is part of her personality – I am not just mummy.

Success is made to look easy by the published successes out there – JK Rowling whipped up her Potter series writing in cafes while her young child slept next to her. Neither of mine napped much, and the second was such a clingy baby, that even putting him down so I could eat my dinner was near-impossible – the day I dropped a chip on his head while eating one-handed has gone down in our family history. To be honest, I was so wiped by then I completely lost my writing mojo and had mentally shelved my book for some years. So in fact, while it has been ten years since starting this book, it has not been a solid decade of writing and constant editing – I would’ve gone crazy long ago. More like four to five years. So for anyone who thinks I have achieved this effortlessly with a Darcey Bussell twirl, it has been anything but. I have fought for my time to write it (not easy with two youngsters to look after), and fought even harder to get it under the right people’s noses with a view to getting it published.

The massive game-changer and milestone for me has to be when a publisher said ‘yes’, when most of last year was radio silence from all the agents I submitted my novel to. I’ve worked in journalism, so you learn to grow a thick skin quickly, but when it’s your own work, your very own baby that people are rejecting, it can be disheartening. I always knew I did not want to self-publish and wanted to do it as part of a team with people who know what they are doing.

The actual work beyond writing ‘THE END’ is far from over. My publishers have created a beautiful cover (you will have to wait a little longer for the big reveal) and are currently doing some jiggery pokery to get all the relevant information uploaded to the interweb – so it will be available for pre-order soon. Pre-orders are a crucial sales method for the writer as well as the reader – it’s a clear message to the publisher that there is demand for that author’s work and may encourage them to invest more to promote the book and to help the author find even more readers.

Pre-ordering is also useful for consumers as it guarantees they’ll immediately receive the book in their hot little paw upon release. If demand is very high or production runs are small, it can be nearly impossible for customers to buy the products normally.

So when the starter gun goes off, please do get your orders in. The massive bonus about this, is that payment is only taken when your item is dispatched to you. WHICH IS MOST LIKELY TO BE THE SECOND PAY DAY AFTER CHRISTMAS, so hopefully everyone’s finances will look a bit more rotund by that point. Quids in.  

At this point, I genuinely do not know how things are going to go, but I can rest assured that the prose is primed to be read. In that respect, my quill is spent. I have poured over countless edits, I have re-read it easily over one hundred times I’m sure. I have crafted it to the best of my ability and I am ready to be its best advocate – who else knows it inside out like me? I know my characters inside out, well, most of them. I’ve even checked the star signs of the main characters. Some of the characters do not make it to the end – well, it’s the apocalypse, not everyone will. And who can overthrow a dystopian world? You’ll have to pre-order THE POISON BALANCE to find out… Stay tuned!

Please ‘follow’ my writing page www.facebook.com/LucyGhose to stay updated with my writing journey. My novel The Poison Balance is coming soon, published by Cranthorpe Millner Publishers. I am also on Instagram and Tiktok @lucyghose

The power of dreams (and being all over the place)

Because we’ve all felt like this before…

I have struggled to concentrate over the past few weeks. There have been things I’ve needed or wanted to do and I’ve wandered around not knowing what which to do first. This could be down to several things: the humidity, recovering from a nasty bout of food poisoning (I lost quarter of a stone, which I hope I can keep off), and coming out the other side of a two-day home learning marketing course.

I’ve got notes all over the place and don’t know what I should be doing next. Interspersed with food shopping demands and laundry that needs doing. Not to mention the dishwasher requests ‘we’ve run out of bowls,’ being behind from the two days when I could not stop being sick.

This will not do, I told myself. I purchased sticky book tabs (colour-coded ones) to put in my notebook course notes for quick reference. On my to-do list is to go back and re-read my notes and use my beautiful rainbow of tabs – they could also be handy when my get my novel back to add tabs to. I’ve seen people do this on Tiktok. I’m beginning to get my head round Tiktok and how it can be useful. There is a whole wealth of people out there who live to read and review books. I am actually quite a slow reader, not in pace, but because I only read a few pages at a time. So much so, that I deliberately don’t borrow library books because invariably I will incur fines because I can not return an unfinished book to the county shelves. Even if I loathe reading a book, I feel I’m doing it a disservice by not finishing it – what if I miss a glinting jewel of content?

I belong to a writing group on facebook that does a weekly post encouraging people to share any good news they’ve had that week – anything from a great book review, to a new chapter they’ve written, etc. I love the positivity that can be found – social media does not need to just be avoiding the trolls and toxic pantomime that often befalls the national press.

Life needs to be about building each other up, not pushing people down. In fact, one of my favourite authors Anna Todd replied to me in person when I put a post on my facebook writing page – the power of social media. The power of being able to directly communicate with readers and engage with them. I suppose the bad feedback is always probable too, but so far all contact I’ve had with people has been positive.

I should also be using this lull before my next round of book edits come back for my attention. Then, one Friday afternoon, when I thought about actually using my last couple of childfree hours of the week on something writerly and creative, my computer did go pfft – I ain’t working anymore, not email, nothing. Not even Microsoft Word.

I haven’t even tackled the cobwebs or the hardwood window that is still stuck shut and refusing to budge after a cold, wet winter. Can I really go and ask my husband for a lump-hammer? He may be wondering which family member I’m planning on using it on…not him, he’s just lovely.

In the time when I was laptop-less, I’ve learned to use it primarily to create videos and posts for social media in order to build up my networks for when my book comes out. I am getting to grips with my graphic design package on my phone and I’m actually really enjoying it. It satisfies the creative part of my brain. Let’s not talk about the part of my brain that just wants to snack and gain all the weight I lost from the food poisoning debacle.

But I’m coming out the other side. I’m incorporating exercise into my day now, well most days. I’m managing to write the first draft of my sequel while I’m waiting for my novel proofs to come back from the publishers. The sticky tabs haven’t been used yet, but I’ve just hit the 40,000 word mark – a great way to start the weekend!

Music is getting me through the writing process, (a-ha of course) and I’m taking inspiration from people with real drive ambition to pinpoint their dreams, visualise them and go for it. The A-ha band members knew they would have to move countries to make it big and they did. The same with Arnold Schwarzenegger – in his Netflix documentary he says he wanted to be the best bodybuilder out there and visualised being on stage with everyone shouting his name. He got his title and his dream played out. I admire the power of dreams, daydreams or whatever. Putting it out there is key. The worst anyone can say is ‘no’. Will ‘no’ kill you? Unlikely.

In my dreams, of which I have dreamed many times, I am standing in front of Morten saying ‘I’ve written a book and you’re in it.’ He’s asked my name and repeated it when I’ve told him. I’d want that more than a selfie to be honest. Why would I want that? What if he didn’t even like the book? I guess I just wanted him to know that he fitted the bill as the protagonist who was intelligent, cared about the planet, thought outside the box, had an eye for the ladies and always looked a little bit pissed off. Not conventionally handsome, quirky, but lovely nonetheless. He changed the very essence of my novel from its original form and provided the handle I needed to drive it forward and get the thing published. Sure, one can never know what goes on in someone else’s head and one could argue that the real Morten would never say or behave like the professor in The Poison Balance. But to me, Professor Joel Harket and Morten are one in the same and for that, I will be forever grateful.

Please ‘like’ my writing page www.facebook.com/LucyGhose to stay updated with my writing journey. My novel The Poison Balance is coming soon, published by Cranthorpe Millner Publishers. I am also on Instagram and Tiktok @lucyghose